Subject: Beliefs (Page 3)

The more you complain, the longer God makes you live.

Characteristics God Life

There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can’t tell the truth without lying.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics Honesty Lies

During Passover, the angel of death passed over the Jews – an event that, up until the late 1950s, was re-enacted every year by Ivy League colleges and suburban country clubs.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Beliefs Religion

Secret: What we tell everybody to tell nobody.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Beliefs Definitions

If God wanted us to believe in him, he’d exist.

(1958 – 2006) English radio performer, stand-up comic & writer
Beliefs God

Every truth passes through three stages before it is recognized: in the first, it is ridiculed, in the second it is opposed, in the third it is regarded as self-evident.

(1788 – 1860) German philosopher
Beliefs Honesty Truth

It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.

Beliefs Proverbs

If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again; it was probably worth it.

Beliefs Money People

Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother’s side.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Beliefs Misspokements Religion

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

Characteristics Honesty Lies Science/Weather

I know what they're waiting for…(the press) is waiting for (Michelle Obama) to get pissed one night and throw all The President's (stuff) out on the lawn.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
Beliefs Emotions Opinion

Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Beliefs Honesty

He will even tell a lie when it is not convenient to.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Beliefs Honesty Lies

Man was predestined to have free will.

Beliefs

Pray, pray very much; but beware of telling god what you want.

Beliefs God Proverbs

Evangelist: A bearer of good tidings who gives us the good news and assures us of our own salvation and damnation of our neighbors.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Beliefs Definitions Religion

A liberal is man who will give away everything he doesn’t own.

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor
Beliefs

Liberal: One who tolerates all beliefs and opinions except those with which he disagrees.

Beliefs Definitions

Age is a function of mind over matter; if you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

(1906 – 1982) baseball player
Age Beliefs Old

As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics Honesty Truth

Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

Beliefs Proverbs