Subject: Conflict (Page 10)

The reason there is so little crime in Germany is that its against the law.

Crime Place Names

Men love war because it allows them to look serious… it is the one thing that stops women laughing at them.

(1926 – 2005) English novelist & essayist
Conflict Emotions Laughter Men People War Women

Smart bombs have bad days too.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws

The sloppier the rebel uniform, the more likely the overthrow of the existing government.

Appearance Clothing Conflict Murphy’s Laws

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Conflict Friends Killing People Young

Shoplifter: A person with a gift of grab.

Conflict Crime Definitions

Probably the toughest time in anyone’s life is when you have to murder a loved one because they’re the devil.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Conflict Killing Life People Time

The Falklands incident was a quarrel between two bald men over a comb.

(1899 – 1986) Argentine writer, essayist, poet & translator
Conflict War

When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping; men invade another country.

(1952 – ) comedian
Eating Men People Shopping War Women

You cannot turn on your television without seeing them, although sometimes you have to hunt around.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Conflict Entertainment Sex Television

Don’t worry about the war; it’s all over but the shooting.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Malaprops War

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter

Conflict Headlines

When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me $85; that’s why in the Navy, the captain goes down with the ship.

(1932 – 2017) comedian, social activist, critic & writer
Arms Conflict

You can fight and all of you will die, or you can surrender in which case only most of you will die.

(1967 – ) English actor
Fights TV/Movie Quotes

When your back is against the wall, there is only one thing to do, and that is turn around and fight.

(1943 – ) British prime minister & politician
Conflict Fights Misspokements

How is it possible to have a civil war?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Conflict War Wordplay

If you are going to tell people the truth, be funny or they will kill you.

(1906 – 2002) Austrian journalist, filmmaker, screenwriter & producer
Communication Honesty Killing Truth

In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students… there were no survivors.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
Arms Conflict

Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.

(1927 – 2004) American comedian & actor
Conflict Fights Marriage

Sometime they'll give a war and nobody will come.

Carl Sandburg (1878 – 1967) biographer & poet
Conflict People War

There are some circles in America where it seems to be more socially acceptable to carry a handgun than a packet of cigarettes.

(1928 – ) British journalist, writer & columnist
America Arms Situations Things