Subject: Food/Drink (Page 19)

I took this girl to dinner, and I heard that women like it when you order for them, so I was like, 'I'll have the special, and she's not getting anything tonight.'

(1981 – ) American comedian, writer & actor
Food/Drink People Situations Women

I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Eating Food/Drink

Beer with no alcohol — what a waste; that is like a nun with a D-cup.

(1958 – ) American actress & stand-up comedian
Alcohol Beer Food/Drink

Men are like chocolate bars: sweet, smooth, and heading straight for your hips.

Food/Drink Men People

Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Conflict Eating Fights Food/Drink Life Success

I would like to find a stew that will give me heartburn immediately, instead of at three o’clock in the morning.

(1882 – 1942) American actor
Food/Drink Health

This recipe is certainly silly; it says to separate two eggs, but it doesn’t say how far to separate them.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Cooking Food/Drink

Someone asked, “Mr. Fields, I read in the paper where you consumed two quarts of liquor a day. What would your father think about that?

Fields’ reply: He'd think I was a sissy.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink

I feel like a drunken man who doesn’t have a drink.

English football player, manager & sports commentator
Alcohol Food/Drink Misspokements

I never eat in a restaurant that’s over a hundred feet off the ground and won’t stand still.

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
Food/Drink

In England there are sixty different religions and only one sauce.

(1563 – 1608) Italian Catholic priest
Beliefs Cooking England Food/Drink Places Religion

Bread that is sliced with an axe is bread that is too nourishing.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Food/Drink

You might be a redneck if… you believe that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Food/Drink People Rednecks

What would you say to a beer, Norm?

Hi ya, sailor. New in town?

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Age Alcohol Beer Food/Drink Young

How’s a beer sound, Norm?

I dunno, I usually finish them before they get a word in.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

It was cool, man, but I’m a little depressed they didn’t have a buffet.

300+ pound American football player
Food/Drink Football Sports

I certainly do not drink all the time, I have to sleep you know.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink Situations Sleep

If you can eat anything you want to, what’s the fun in eating anything you want to?

(1956 – ) American movie actor
Eating Emotions Food/Drink Happiness

Woody: Would you like a beer, Mr. Peterson?

Norm: No, I’d like a dead cat in a glass.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer

Vegetable: A substance used to ballast a child’s plate while it’s carried to and from the table.

Definitions Food/Drink