Subject: Food/Drink (Page 24)

He found that a fork in his inexperienced hand was an instrument of chase rather than capture.

(1866 – 1946) English author
Eating Food/Drink

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case, you figure it out.

(1958 – ) American actress & singer
Beer Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

I like fruit baskets because it gives you the ability to mail someone a piece of fruit without appearing insane.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Food/Drink

You’re trying to give him goremets dinners.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Food/Drink Malaprops

It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and the D.T.'s begin.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink Health Hollywood Places

I hope God speaks English; if I get up to heaven and have to point at a menu, I'm gonna be pissed.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Beliefs Communication Eating God Language

You are not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

(1917 – 1995) singer, actor & comedian
Alcohol

You don't get ulcers from what you eat; you get them from what's eating you.

(1888 – 1960) Austrian writer
Eating Food/Drink Health Problems

“Sir, the cereal is bland and unfulfilling, what should we name it?” … ”Life.”

American comedian
Food/Drink

My mother was the worst cook ever; in school, when we traded lunches, I had to throw in an article of clothing.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Clothing Cooking Family Food/Drink Mothers

Hors d'oeuvres: A sandwich cut into 20 pieces.

Definitions Food/Drink

Turkey can never beat cow.

(1970 – ) American actor, writer & carpenter
Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

How’s life treating you?

It’s not, Sammy, but you can.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

In order to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.

(1934 – 1996) American astronomer, astrophysicist & author
Cooking Food/Drink Science/Weather

Personally, I never drink on Oscar nights, as it interferes with my suffering.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Alcohol Emotions Food/Drink

Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log.

(1958 – ) comedian, actress & television host
Food/Drink

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction: I get to the end and say to myself "well, that's not going to happen.”

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Cooking Food/Drink

Acute Alcoholic: An attractive drunk.

Alcohol Definitions

The food on the plane was fit for a king… “Here, King!”

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Food/Drink

I’m no cook; when I want lemon on chicken, I spray it with Pledge.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Cooking Food/Drink Self

Chinese Food: You do not sew with a fork, and I see no reason why you should eat with knitting needles.

Muppet character (Frank Oz)
Eating Food/Drink Things TV/Movie Quotes