Subject: Food/Drink (Page 36)

A study shows breast implants can cause nausea and dizziness… from all the free drinks.

(1962 – ) American actor and talk show host
Alcohol Appearance Health

There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Food/Drink People Things

People who eat natural foods will die of natural causes.

Food/Drink

My mom bought cookies… and they were never the good cookies; it was always the pack of 1000 that said: 'Cookies.'

comedian
Food/Drink Money Poverty

I like a lot of partisan cheese on my pizza.

Food/Drink Malaprops

Acute Alcoholic: An attractive drunk.

Alcohol Definitions

Actually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded; trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Alcohol Food/Drink

Golfing excellence goes hand in hand with alcohol, as many an Open and Amateur champion has shown.

British golf writer & commentator
Alcohol Food/Drink Golf Sports

What am I drinking? … NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink Health

I eat like a vulture… unfortunately the resemblance doesn't end there.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Appearance Eating Food/Drink

Gourmet: A food fetishist.

Cooking Definitions Food/Drink Occupations

Louisiana has the best food on the planet if you don't really ask too much about what you're eating.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Eating Food/Drink Places

Grilled Chicken Ass

Food/Drink Translations

Preheat: To turn on the heat in an oven for a period of time before cooking a dish, so that the fingers may be burned when the food is put in, in addition to when it is removed.

Cooking Definitions

You can travel fifty thousand miles in America without once tasting a piece of good bread.

(1891 – 1980) novelist & painter
Activities America Food/Drink Places Travel

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they’ve always worked for me.

(1937 – 2005) journalist & author
Alcohol Drugs Life Self

I’m so holy that when I touch wine, it turns into water.

(1877 – 1957) 48th Imam of the Nizari Ismaili community & [founder &] president of the All-India Muslim League
Alcohol Food/Drink

I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion.

(1547 – 1616) Spanish novelist, poet & playwright
Alcohol Food/Drink

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first; by the second day you're off it.

(1924 – 2003) American comedian & actor
Food/Drink Health

Never drink anything that’s still on fire.

Alcohol Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

Secretary: Someday you'll drown in a vat of whiskey.

Field’s reply as an aside: Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting?

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Death Food/Drink