Subject: Age » Old (Page 11)

We thought it was a bad idea you guys got married, but we didn’t feel like we could say anything because it was open bar.

(1974 – ) American stand-up comedian
Alcohol Friends Marriage Old People

I don’t plan to grow old gracefully; I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Age Appearance Body Old

I watched Ken Burns' Civil War series on PBS… my favorite segment is when Bob Hope entertains the troops at Gettysburg.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Age Old People

Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Age Health Old Young

The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles.

(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher
Age Entertainment Music Old People

The older I get, the better I used to be.

(1942 – ) American professional golfer
Age Golf Old Sports

Nothing makes a smoker happier than to see an old person smoking.

(1961 – 1994) comedian
Activities Age Happiness Health Old

When you feel that you would like to go back to your youth, think of algebra.

Age Old Young

I don’t know why my elderly neighbor bothers subscribing to newspapers if he’s just going to let them pile up outside his house.

comedian
Age Old

To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Characteristics Friends Old People Women

A woman is as old as she looks before breakfast.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Age Appearance Old People Women

Senility: The pleasantly rueful experience of forgetting what we’ve forgotten.

Age Definitions Intelligence Memory Old

I smoke 10 to 15 cigars a day, at my age I have to hold on to something.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Activities Age Old

When you are over the hill, you pick up speed.

Age Murphy’s Laws Old

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

(1906 – 1982) baseball player
Age Characteristics Old

Fiber: Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Age Definitions Food/Drink Health Old

A sexagenarian? At his age? I think that’s disgusting!

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Age Misspokements Old Sex TV/Movie Quotes

You know you're old if your walker has an airbag.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Age Old

She is so old… she was the waitress at the last supper.

Age Exaggerations Old

People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Age Life Old

He's as old as some trees.

Canadian hockey player & coach
Age Hockey Old Sports