Author: Anonymous Page 159

“This pencil tip is dull,” she said pointedly.

Tom Swifties

“OK, you can borrow it again,” Tom relented.

Tom Swifties

“That’s price-fixing!” said Tom caustically.

Tom Swifties

Step up to the plate and pick up the gauntlet.

Mixed metaphors

“It’s not fair!” said Tom darkly.

Tom Swifties

Jealousy: The tribute mediocrity pays to genius.

Characteristics Definitions

“I’ll get you out of prison in no time,” said Tom balefully.

Tom Swifties

Cartoon: What’s sung when driving your car.

Definitions

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

Alcohol Food/Drink

If your time ain't come, not even a doctor can kill you.

Death Doctors Health Life Situations

He's going up and down like a metronome.

Malaprops

“The average frequency of my voice is 160 Hz,” said Tom in measured tones.

Tom Swifties

Why is it that when a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment, but when a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95/minute?

Communication Men Speech Women

He was grinning like a butchers dog.

Emotions Expressions Happiness

We could stand here and talk until the cows turn blue.

Mixed metaphors

She may want to tackle that battle.

Mixed metaphors

Business Forecaster: A person who is uncertain about the future and hazy about the present.

Definitions

“I’ve paid my annual subscription,” Tom remembered.

Tom Swifties

“This oar is broken,” said Tom robustly.

Tom Swifties

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.

Characteristics

Aardvark: In the beginning was the word. And the word was ‘Aardvark.’

Communication Definitions Language