Subject: Science/Weather (Page 4)

How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue…and then you add eggs and sugar and you get cake?… where does the glue go?"

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Cooking Food/Drink Science/Weather

1. If it is green or it wiggles – it is Biology.
2. If it stinks – it is Chemistry.
3. If it doesn’t work – it is Physics.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Science/Weather

Psychology: The science that tells you what you already know in words you can’t understand.

Definitions Science/Weather

If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Misspokements Science/Weather

If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Science/Weather Wordplay

How do you write zero in Roman numerals?

Science/Weather

Sleet: A slipcover.

Definitions Science/Weather

How does Teflon stick to the pan?

Science/Weather

The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology; until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Beliefs People Religion Science/Weather

I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director
Animals Science/Weather

The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.

Body Cold Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Situations

We shall never be content until man makes his own weather and keeps it to himself.

(1859 – 1927) English writer
Science/Weather

Normally in Chicago, you always have some kind of weather.

Football Misspokements Science/Weather Sports

No matter how rich you become, how famous or powerful, when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather.

comedian, counselor & speaker
Death Science/Weather Success Wealth

Math Anxiety: An intense lifelong fear of two trains approaching each other at speeds of 60 and 80 mph.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Science/Weather

Show me an archaeologist, and I’ll show you a man who practices skull drudgery.

Science/Weather Wordplay

It is best to read the weather forecast before we pray for rain.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Intelligence Science/Weather

The speed of an oncoming vehicle is directly proportional to the length of the passing zone.

Activities Driving Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather

Hotter than a depot stove

Expressions Science/Weather

I took a physics course that was so hard I couldn't find the classroom.

comedian
Education School Science/Weather

Arithmetic is being able to count up to twenty without taking off your shoes.

cartoon character
Science/Weather